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Saturday, February 17, 2007

What I've Learned From Herpes

Life Lessons That Getting Herpes Forced Me To Learn. Some funny, some not so funny, but all true. I don't even remember where I got this list of lessons from, but I wanted to save it here. Enjoy.

1) I am not bullet proof

2) My vagina is not bullet proof

3) If I need to feel less alone all I need to do is some mental math on how many people in the room probably have herpes.

4) Sex without lubrication was never a good thing, now it's even less of a good thing.

5) Good people don't abandon you because you have a stupid virus and the really good ones offer you support that empowers you to be able to "get on" with things.

6) Telling a guy you have herpes in hopes that he'll finally stop chasing you is not a good strategy. What the heck are you supposed to say when the macho jerk says "you are worth the risk"? My advice, tell him from the start that you are not interested in him. (And as soon as I get up the courage, I'll do just that.)

7) Telling the exboyfriend whom you never got over that you have herpes doesn't work either. They'll tell you something like "I'd still do you if I was still single" and then you sit there wanting what you can no longer have since he is now married.

8) I have (well had, till it regrows) a grey pubic hair and a mole down there ... interesting

9) I can make my labia lipsync to the radio while inspecting for lesions... a sure sign I spent too much time pointing mirrors down there during the first few months.

10) Some doctors are idiots, some are good, some are great, but most need to develop a better sense of humor. I mean really, how can a doctor with a straight face suggest you try alternate positions for sex to mitigate transmission risks, then wonder why you are getting the giggles, and then look appauled when you ask him whether it should be you or your partner hanging from the chandelier.

11) If one more person suggests I eat more garlic/sunflower seeds, echanacia, flax etc. I may just scream!

12) Rootbeer floats don't cure a darn thing, but they do make you feel better for a little while.

13) My ferret doesn't care that I have herpes. He still wants to play with me and hide all my socks.

14) Eventually, looking for lesions gets to be very boring as a hobby

15) There is not a neon sign hanging over my had flashing "Get herpes here, free!"

16) I am not being punished, if anything I have grown as a person since getting this. How can that be punishment?

17) Helping others get through the shock of discovering they have herpes helped me move forward too.

18) Things do get better with time, and that goes for more than just herpes

19) The world is still spinning, and

20) I am far more than this virus, far, far more!!



Anonymous R said...

This made me laugh. Thank you for sharing it.

Thursday, February 22, 2007 5:57:00 PM  
Blogger Luanne said...

Thanks. I liked it too. I'll have to try and track that down and figure out who wrote it. Might just be something that had been circulating. Stick around, I find some interesting things to post from time to time ;-)

Thursday, February 22, 2007 9:52:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thanks for the humor. Its all very tru. I have had the herpes virus for almost 15 yrs. It has become somewhat benign over the year. I still have to "tell" a potential partner. I usually tell them early on, before a connection is made. They either make up a stupid excuse or they accept it. Its happened both ways. At any rate, the social stigma still exists and its very upsetting at times. Even though I know rationally that I am NOT the virus and its only a tiny part of my life, when the rejection does happen, it hurts. Sometimes I don't even want to tell them, but that is not who I am as a person.

Monday, March 12, 2007 7:33:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thanks for that! We need more people like you to encourage empowerment. There are so many people out there with herpes (and genital HSV-1, like me), and too many people lose hope. Reading this blog makes me feel much better about myself. Thank you, and keep spreading the word!

Sunday, April 15, 2007 3:42:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I don't have herpes, but have recently started dating someone who does. He told me on our third date..and we hadn't even kissed! I went and talked to my doctor, and she was excellent and took the time to talk to me about it, and put a positive spin on the situation. I have enjoyed reading your blog, and you have helped me work towards acceptance. Much of what I read on the web can be negative, to say the least. THANK YOU!

Sunday, July 29, 2007 12:11:00 PM  
Blogger Luanne said...

I'm glad I could be here for you to find that in my opinion, having herpes is not the end of the world. Things happen in this life and there are so many other things which are so much more tragic. I agree that there is alot of negative press out there in regard to herpes, but seriously, for those of us who do have it, we can either accept it or live in denial. Sounds like your man is also choosing to accept it and be accepting of himself living with this virus. Kudos to him :-) and you for reading other people's stories and opinions. Half full or half empty ;-)

Tuesday, July 31, 2007 7:17:00 PM  
Blogger Bizzaro. said...

Kudos to you for this. Life is too short to live in fear and I agree. You have to be happy with yourself before you can be happy with anyone else.

Don't let the man getcha down and stop that lip syncing thing. It's creepy.

Monday, December 03, 2007 5:55:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...


Your post made me laugh..esp cause I have (or had until I remove it) a grey hair and a mole down there too!! and H...

we must be win sisters from different misters...lol

Wednesday, July 16, 2008 6:44:00 PM  
Blogger Luanne said...

:-) You're welcome. Glad you enjoyed it.

Thursday, July 17, 2008 7:19:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I am still in the grieving stage, I suppose you could say, however, I believe you just helped me move on a little bit. Your posts have made me laugh as well as cry, and it is soo comforting to know you are actually okay (and seemingly happy) after learning you have herpes. I admire you taking the time to truly care about the peace of mind of others. Thanks.

Wednesday, April 22, 2009 10:26:00 PM  
Blogger Luanne said...

You're welcome. What other choice do we have? We can choose to either be happy or depressed. It's very normal to go through the "depressed" mode for a period of time, but in order to deal with it, we need to learn how to accept and not be so fearful of herpes. I have written tons of stuff on this website which will hopefully make you feel better. Enjoy and trust me, it's NOT the end of the world. Once you get past the initial shock, you'll learn how to cope. Luckily, we all have the internet and can "speak" about this privately, to find the courage to actually learn to say the word Herpes outloud!! Try it a few times, it gets easier each time you "hear" yourself say the word herpes. You'll be OK. Hang in there.

Thursday, April 23, 2009 11:10:00 AM  
Anonymous Lorraine aka Starratt (original author of this list) said...

Hi there -

I am the orignal auther HONEST. I'm glad others have enjoyed it enough to repost it. I was actually trying to track it down because I had lost my original file with it in it. So you have done me a favor by posting it here :).

There are two support groups that I have posted it to in the past, but I am still a member of the support group at www.Racoon.com. Feel free to drop by our community if you need information / support /etc.

Kindest regards,
(aka Starratt)

Friday, December 11, 2009 1:14:00 PM  
Blogger Luanne said...

Hi there Lorraine. Good to hear from you. I used to be on PUP, but left there a long time ago. Did you ever finally get married? I had no idea that this was something which you had authored. Had I known, I would have certainly asked permission. I definitely thought it was worthy of being reposted and glad I enjoyed it enough to share with others. Hope all is well with you. Merry Christmas :-)

Friday, December 11, 2009 6:37:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

this is funny i like it it cheered me up

Tuesday, October 19, 2010 3:41:00 AM  
Anonymous Dee89 said...

This brought a smile to my sad face :)

Wednesday, July 11, 2012 1:10:00 AM  
Blogger Luanne said...

It's all so true though - glad I could share a smile :-)

Monday, August 06, 2012 10:39:00 AM  

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